‘So much of the church,’ said Desiree, ‘is about marriage.’ Desiree was giving a talk on singledom at C3 Ballina*, and I love that the first thing she does is acknowledge how much of church life is focused on and revolves around couples. (Disclaimer: Desiree also references my book, Surviving Singledom, so I am somewhat biased […]
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Writing Tribe
I love my tribe of writers. We meet once every couple of months with local fellow writers, and we have an international conference every year. We are Christians of all ages, all personality types, and all writing genres. I suppose some would consider this group an extra commitment, like a chore. But for me, it’s […]
How ‘Two Sisters and a Brain Tumour’ Helped Me
I recently read Two Sisters and a Brain Tumour, a memoir by author friend Emily J. Maurits. Even though it was about a brain tumour, I enjoyed reading it—probably because it was about so much more than that. The author takes us on a journey through her relationship with her sister, with all the tension and […]
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Single and Sick
I recently took my husband to hospital for a day procedure. Afterwards, when we got back home and were recovering, he looked at me and said, ‘I can’t imagine how I would do this hospital stuff if I was still single!’ ‘I can’t imagine how I would do this hospital stuff if I was still […]
Serving While I’m Sick
When I’m sick, I feel useless. I question my worth, and what’s worse, others question it too. I have to be a ‘contributing’ member of society, proving my value through usefulness and productivity. Even in church, there’s pressure to ‘contribute’ in some shape or form. So how do I contribute when I’m down for the […]
In Honour of Bereaved Mothers
This Sunday is International Bereaved Mother’s Day (first Sunday in May every year). In honour of bereaved mothers everywhere, I want to acknowledge the different kinds of bereaved mothers in our communities. The mothers who had a child or children and lost them. The mothers of stillborn babies. The mothers who lost pregnancies to miscarriage. […]
For Singles: Milestones Worth Celebrating
Single people frequently feel left out of major life milestones and celebrations. Married people get to have weddings, bridal showers, kitchen teas, Valentine’s Days and anniversaries. If they have children, they get baby showers, Mother’s and Father’s Days, and all their children’s milestones too: first steps, first words, starting school, first dates, graduation, first jobs, […]
*When* You Have Kids…
Why do people say, ‘When you have kids…’ as though they know my future? It’s just as annoying as, ‘When you get married…’ Such blanket statements bely an assumption that we are all the same and will all follow the same trajectory in life: get married, have kids, raise them, kick them out of home […]
Real Family
Ugh. It’s Valentine’s Day again. The time when everyone worships at the altar of dating, romance and marriage. The time when talk of ‘family’ means you have to have a partner (and usually children too). I can’t stand it. And I’m one of the marrieds. My heart goes out to single people this time of […]
To Argue or Not To Argue…On Social Media?
I usually avoid online arguments like the plague. Don’t get me wrong, a lot of arguments on social media are worthy. Things like ‘Is COVID-19 Real?’ and ‘Who is Keeping Our Government Accountable?’ and ‘What is Your Favourite Musical and Why is it Hamilton?’ Then there are religious debates. The place of LGBQTI+ people in […]