‘So, when are you guys gonna have kids?’ My friend’s question hit me square between the eyes. To say I was surprised would have been an understatement. I was freshly engaged, not yet married. Was it normal to be pestered by baby-related questions the minute one got engaged? Unfortunately, I am not alone in my […]
Continue reading The Pressure to Marry (and Become an Instant Baby-Making Machine)
I’ve been listening to music during my latest illness flare. A lot. You could say music is my IV. Music has always been a lifeline for me. From childhood days when I would sing songs softly to God at bedtime, through teenaged years of alternate rock and angst-ridden folklore, to now when I sing for […]
A new devotional for people facing infertility was recently released in Australia. Praying Through Infertility is an up-close-and-personal look at the rollercoaster of infertility and childlessness, and it offers encouragement, comfort, scripture and prayer for those who are struggling. On a more personal note, I want to share why contributing to this book has meant so much […]
Continue reading Praying Through Infertility: On A Personal Note
There are few books devoted to people facing infertility. Fewer still address issues of faith, and even fewer are written with both men and women in mind. That’s what makes this book so special: it achieves all three. Praying Through Infertility is a unique book that seeks to reach out and comfort men, women and couples […]
Next week the topics for World Childless Week 2023 will be announced and I can’t wait! I’m already drafting ideas for World Childless Week. I’m determined to submit something, even though I’m not sure what it will be yet. I’m still in the brainstorming stages, and I’m sure the topic announcements next week will help […]
‘How do you deal with being childless at church?’ a friend recently asked me. ‘Do people put pressure on you to “Be fruitful and multiply”?’ I nodded emphatically. ‘You betcha. Happens all the time.’ Her eyes widened. ‘How do you deal with that?’ It’s a good question, isn’t it? What is the best way to […]
Can one ‘Be fruitful and multiply’ without having kids? This is a question I debate with myself on a regular basis. Mostly because childless (and childfree) people are often chided with the whole ‘But God commands us to be fruitful’ thing when others learn of our crime of childlessness. Yeah. I don’t love it either. […]
‘It’s God’s plan’, they say, As I quietly unravel, Wiping the tears discretely, So as not to interrupt Their conversation. I gather memories, images Of children I never had Like star clusters Sparkling in the black void. *** ‘It’s God’s plan’, they say, As I sidestep the awkward question About ‘family’, As I avoid the […]
I don’t know why so many people say the grief of childlessness is ‘God’s plan’. To be fair, when Christians say devastating events are ‘God’s plan’, I don’t think they mean God is a sadistic old so-and-so who is detached from our suffering and rather enjoys inflicting pain. (At least, I hope not.) Nor do I […]
Perhaps if they didn’t say, ‘It’s God plan,’ there would just be an uncomfortable silence. Perhaps that’s why they fill it with words—even if the words crack and splinter, breaking apart in our hands. How easily the words crumble, revealing they were hollow inside. How often we patch up grief with platitudes. How often we […]