Why I Don’t Mind Turning 40

Some people are terribly afraid of ageing. In my early twenties I travelled with a group of girls who were petrified of the big two-five. ‘I really struggled with turning twenty,’ one of them confided. ‘I don’t know how I’ll cope with being twenty-five.’  I was in my thirties at the time.  It baffled me […]

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The Power of Rest

Rest is countercultural. It challenges popular notions of busyness and productivity, of working and earning, of our value lying in usefulness. ‘Achievers’ often receive praise and accolades, and busyness is socially reinforced. ‘How are you?’ ‘Oh, you know, busy.’ ‘I got a lot done today.’ ‘Let me check my diary and get back to you.’ […]

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Identity Crisis

Have you seen that movie where the guy says to the girl, ‘You complete me?’  Ugh.  Notice I did not mention which movie. I don’t have to. I have heard this sentiment expressed many times, in conversations, in songs, in the interrogations of single people as though their lives depended on getting married.  This concept […]

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Valuable Connections

When I was single, I attended a small community church and they welcomed me as one of their own. It felt like I had been part of the family for years, maybe even decades. They were like a spiritual family to me. So readily did they embrace me that one particular family included me in […]

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A Countercultural Conversation with Craig Wynne

Twelve years ago I was a frustrated singleton. I went shopping for books on the subject, but I found, to my dismay, there was not much out there. This was the inspiration behind my book, Surviving Singledom. Since then, to my relief, more and more books have come out about surviving, embracing and celebrating the […]

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A Stranger on Earth

Living on earth can take a toll on us. Pandemics. Natural disasters. Poverty. The exhaustion of politics, corruption and social causes. This life can be painful. And some days it can feel like the pain will never end. As a person living with chronic illness, the pain is literally never-ending. Don’t get me wrong. Some […]

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Single vs Pre-Married

I walked into church and was greeted by an usher. ‘Hiya Steph,’ he said cheerfully, ‘How’s your love life?’ Oh no. You did not just ask me that. My sarcastic inner voice nearly replied out loud. ‘It’s great. Who are you, by the way?’ This man barely knew me. We were not close, yet he […]

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Creative Compost

I wrote a blog earlier today. And it stank. It stank like a bucket of prawns in the sun. It stank like a drain. It stank so much it took my mind off the stinky cat litter in the next room. It stank like a compost heap. Why am I writing about a stinky blog? […]

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10 Things I Love About You: An Open Letter To COVID-19

Dear COVID-19, It seems only yesterday you came into my life. You have been here for a couple of months now, and while our relationship is still new, I feel as though I am beginning to get to know you. You have changed my life. Of course, COVID-19, it is tempting to treat this letter […]

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Surviving Valentine’s Day

Ugh. Not another Valentine’s Day. The Day when all romance is celebrating in a seemingly never-ending stream of chocolates, red roses and plush teddies holding cute little love hearts. Makes me wanna barf. (And I am its target demographic. Go figure.) And it is not just the rampant commercialism. Sure, I hate the overflow of […]

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