What about Faith? Faith can be a two-edged sword with chronic illness. On the one hand, God’s nearness and companionship have been a great comfort to me. On the other, God has not healed me of lupus. I have wrestled with this. After all, it would be a whole lot easier if God would simply […]
grief
Why Living with Lupus is Like a Scavenger Hunt—Part 2
Finding my Tribe It’s not easy to find support for a rare disease like lupus. But I have a few close friends with autoimmune conditions, and there is nothing quite like the breath of fresh air that is a friend who gets it. When they describe the sensation of brain fog and I say, ‘Oh, […]
Join the (Childless) Club
It’s the club nobody wants to join. I certainly didn’t wake up one morning and think, ‘I’d really like to become part of the childless community today.’ Yet here we are. It can be hard to find childless people who are happy to share even a small part of their story. Harder still is finding […]
Survival Skills: It’s Not Fair!
There are times when I get super jealous of able-bodied people. There, I said it. As much as envy is not exactly a fruit of the Spirit, this try-hard Christian experiences jealousy on a semi-regular basis. I feel it watching other people climb stairs without a problem. I experience it when friends regale me with […]
Survival Skills: Beauty and Breath
In the cool of the evening, I walk down the winding street toward the lake. The sunlight is fading gently into deep yellow and orange, the feathered clouds tinged with pink. There are a few joggers and dog walkers about, and we exchange a nod and a soft greeting. I pass gum trees, bottle brushes […]
Survival Skills: Grieving Spaces
I woke up with a niggle in my chest. It’s fine, I told myself. I took pain killers anyway. They I laid down to rest, but the pain became rapidly worse. So I got up, sat on the couch, and began praying that the pain killers would kick in really soon. Twenty minutes later I […]
I Feel Seen…Or A Shameless Promo for World Childless Week
It can be hard to feel seen. In today’s online world, where our opinions and values are often reduced to brief social media posts or twenty-second soundbites, the risk of being misunderstood and openly criticised is real. Even in Zoom-based interactions, it can be challenging to read facial expressions and body language accurately. We can […]
What I Do on a Wobbly Day
I had one of those days. Yep, you guessed it. I had a wobbly day. Right before Father’s Day too. I was out with friends. The conversation turned, quite inexplicably, toward babies, miscarriage and mothers who had nearly lost their children in childbirth. It would have been fine if it hadn’t gone on so long. […]
It Takes A Village…To Survive Childlessness
Submissions for the annual World Childless Week (WCW)* opened this week. I’m already thinking about what I might submit by way of written pieces. Inevitably, this has got me reflecting on why we bother to write at all, especially for something as public as WCW. I write partly for selfish reasons. Writing about my childless […]
Praying Through Infertility—Faith Renovations
‘When we start from the foundation of knowing we are loved, rather than demolishing our faith, times of pain can lead to faith renovations…’ – ‘A Firm Foundation’, Katherine Gantlett, from Praying Through Infertility. This quote for me sums up the entire message and tone of Praying Through Infertility, the 90-day devotional for men and women struggling […]