I recently read Two Sisters and a Brain Tumour, a memoir by author friend Emily J. Maurits. Even though it was about a brain tumour, I enjoyed reading it—probably because it was about so much more than that. The author takes us on a journey through her relationship with her sister, with all the tension and […]
God
The Need for Silent Night
Everyone is talking about self-care this Christmas. For each of us, self-care will look different, depending on our personality, holiday plans and personal circumstances. Personally, I am living with childlessness and chronic illness. (And a cat. So it is not all bad.) Which begs the question: how does a person with grief and sickness celebrate […]
Unto Us a Child is Born…
‘Unto us a child is born…’ (Isaiah 9:6) Such a beautiful, inspiring verse. What does this verse mean for those who are childless? ‘Unto us a child is born…’ It’s a bold anthem of hope for the people of the world, that Christ our Saviour has come to us. ‘Unto us a child is born…’ […]
‘Be Fruitful and Multiply’—‘I Am!’
Can one ‘Be fruitful and multiply’ without having kids? This is a question I debate with myself on a regular basis. Mostly because childless (and childfree) people are often chided with the whole ‘But God commands us to be fruitful’ thing when others learn of our crime of childlessness. Yeah. I don’t love it either. […]
A Story of Life
‘An unusual story of grief over a beloved pet and shared through cake and all things lemon. The ritual of death and new growth is wonderfully encapsulated through the lemon tree.’—Lorraine Marwood, Stories of Life judge and award-winning author Yesterday my short story, Love and Lemon Cake, won second prize in the Stories of Life competition (short story category). I […]
Unravelling
‘It’s God’s plan’, they say, As I quietly unravel, Wiping the tears discretely, So as not to interrupt Their conversation. I gather memories, images Of children I never had Like star clusters Sparkling in the black void. *** ‘It’s God’s plan’, they say, As I sidestep the awkward question About ‘family’, As I avoid the […]
God’s Plan?
I don’t know why so many people say the grief of childlessness is ‘God’s plan’. To be fair, when Christians say devastating events are ‘God’s plan’, I don’t think they mean God is a sadistic old so-and-so who is detached from our suffering and rather enjoys inflicting pain. (At least, I hope not.) Nor do I […]
Play It Safe
“‘That’s a terrible way to live! It’s criminal to live cautiously like that! If you knew I was after the best, why did you do less than the least? The least you could have done would have been to invest the sum with the bankers, where at least I would have gotten a little interest. […]
The Sound of Silence
Perhaps if they didn’t say, ‘It’s God plan,’ there would just be an uncomfortable silence. Perhaps that’s why they fill it with words—even if the words crack and splinter, breaking apart in our hands. How easily the words crumble, revealing they were hollow inside. How often we patch up grief with platitudes. How often we […]
Serving While I’m Sick
When I’m sick, I feel useless. I question my worth, and what’s worse, others question it too. I have to be a ‘contributing’ member of society, proving my value through usefulness and productivity. Even in church, there’s pressure to ‘contribute’ in some shape or form. So how do I contribute when I’m down for the […]