Non-writers make strange comments sometimes. When I tell people I am currently writing a book about Surviving Childlessness, they often say things like, “That must be wonderfully cathartic.” “I think you misunderstand me,” I do not reply. The catharsis theory is a popular one. It presupposes that writing is inherently therapeutic. I guess that it […]
Childless at Easter
So we are about to head to church on a Good Friday. One of the most celebrated, heavily attended, child-focused days of the year. And we do not have children. I am trying to identify this feeling I have about going to church today. It is not quite dread. Nor is it exactly apprehension. I […]
Lamentations Song – 1000 Views Special
No-one was more surprised than I was to see Lamentations Song pass 1000 views on YouTube this week. In honour of this momentous occasion, I feel it is time to review this song again. (I have already blogged about it before, but why not blog about it again?) There are certain unwritten rules when it […]
Too Picky?
A reader recently commented on one of my blogs about singleness, saying they were told to just pick someone and marry them because “anyone will do”. They were told, unbelievingly, to stop being so fussy. This story struck a chord with me. During my painfully single twenties, I was regularly asked if I was “picky”. […]
Badge of Honour
The place is a disaster zone. Furniture overturned. Rubbish piled high. Chaos and disorganisation as far as the eye can see. Yep, I just moved house. It is easy to see a new house as being some kind of badge of honour. Society tells us that material things are markers of success. Got the house? […]
Childless-By-Forced-Choice
I was married for two years when I was diagnosed with lupus. I was thirty-one at the time. The lupus diagnosis came after eight years of mysterious symptoms and misdiagnoses. (In that respect, the diagnosis was a blessing.) It was not a shock. It finally gave me clarity on all the bizarre, seemingly coincidental medical […]
Surviving Valentine’s Day
Red roses. Fluffy teddies. Umpteen love hearts on social media feed. Yep, it must be Valentine’s Day. I had a lot of trouble tolerating Valentine’s Day when I was single. And it was not just the pointless commercialism. It was the unsubtle message that you have to be admired by someone to be a worthwhile […]
Thank You
I am not accustomed to being thanked. As a writer, I typically sit on my lounge or in my writing ball chair, iPad perched on my knees, tapping madly away, happily oblivious to the outside world. I can sit like that for hours. I might take a break at some point, eat some food, pat […]
Pass It On
I had a challenging time with childlessness at work this week. Normally I am fine with childlessness at work; I talk to parents all the time, no biggie. This week, we had a training day on learning to run a new group for parents. No problemo. I did not even think twice about it. On […]
Resolutions
I hereby resolve not to make any New Years’ Resolutions. Ok, maybe just one. It’s so easy, isn’t it? We make these promises to ourselves with the turn of the year. We commit ourselves to a worthy cause or new endeavour or old dream and vow to make it happen. There is something about a […]