A friend asked me this morning what I planned to do with the rest of today. “I’ll be working from home,” was my reply. Immediately she asked how I had managed to arrange that in my line of work (counselling). “No,” I clarified, “Today is my other job. The one for which I do not […]
Lives on the Line – A Reprise
He caught my eye as he walked past my seat on the train. Dressed in dark, drab clothing, with sunken cheekbones and a weather-worn face, he held the air of one who had nowhere to go. He sank into the seat behind me and leaned heavily against the window. He will be here til the […]
Lucky
“You’re so lucky you don’t have kids.” I was sitting in the lunchroom at work this week with two other colleagues. They were conversing about their problems with their respective children. On and on it went, all the issues and frustrations and complaints. I was mostly listening rather than talking. I did not feel I […]
Imprisoned
There are times in my wonderful, creative, blessed life when I feel imprisoned. I know I am a free white person and I understand the social and political privileges that come with that. But. I am living with chronic illness. And there are days when I feel caged in on all sides. Chronic illness is […]
Healthy Comparison?
I hardly ever get jealous of other people. Except for one time. Real bad. A few years ago, I was working on a musical project with a bunch of other musicians. One musician in particular was doing very well in this project. She was a talented musician whom I admired. She was popular with everyone. […]
The Piano Man
I have always been allergic to musical instruments. As a teenager, I was an enthusiastic singer, but I could not bear to touch an instrument, let alone attempt to play one. I avoided instruments like the plague. The reason for this was my lack of coordination. I was accident-prone. I was constantly walking into things, […]
A Mother’s Comfort
“As a mother comforts her child, So I will comfort you. You will be comforted in Jerusalem.” (Isaiah 66:13, The Message.) This year, Mother’s Day has turned my thoughts toward God. Odd, you say? Yes, for me too. Do not worry, I am not about to embark upon a feminist-fueled rant about the relative merits […]
Lupus Is Easy
I’m pretty annoyed as I write this. Actually, I’m livid. It is not every day someone makes a comment that gets me this riled up. Except for a doctor who minimises my experience of chronic illness. I have been avoiding finding a new GP. But last week it was necessary. My chronic illness flared up […]
Keep Calm and Keep On Writing
Non-writers make strange comments sometimes. When I tell people I am currently writing a book about Surviving Childlessness, they often say things like, “That must be wonderfully cathartic.” “I think you misunderstand me,” I do not reply. The catharsis theory is a popular one. It presupposes that writing is inherently therapeutic. I guess that it […]
Childless at Easter
So we are about to head to church on a Good Friday. One of the most celebrated, heavily attended, child-focused days of the year. And we do not have children. I am trying to identify this feeling I have about going to church today. It is not quite dread. Nor is it exactly apprehension. I […]