I love Jacaranda trees. When I was growing up, one of our houses had a glorious Jacaranda tree in the backyard. Its branches stretched over a large part of the lawn, and every spring our backyard became blanketed in purple. The sight of a Jacaranda tree still gives me the warm fuzzies. Especially when in […]
Counter-culturalism
Counter-cultural challenges to the modern church and to society in general
Sex and Singledom
It’s hard not having sex when you’re single. Even when you’re a Christian. And even when you’re female. I’ve heard Christians still have sex before marriage, they just wait longer than the non-Christian mainstream. And Christians utilise porn, both men and women. So Christians are thinking about sex, and having sex, despite the church’s teachings […]
Why I Don’t Mind Turning 40
Some people are terribly afraid of ageing. In my early twenties I travelled with a group of girls who were petrified of the big two-five. ‘I really struggled with turning twenty,’ one of them confided. ‘I don’t know how I’ll cope with being twenty-five.’ I was in my thirties at the time. It baffled me […]
The Power of Rest
Rest is countercultural. It challenges popular notions of busyness and productivity, of working and earning, of our value lying in usefulness. ‘Achievers’ often receive praise and accolades, and busyness is socially reinforced. ‘How are you?’ ‘Oh, you know, busy.’ ‘I got a lot done today.’ ‘Let me check my diary and get back to you.’ […]
Identity Crisis
Have you seen that movie where the guy says to the girl, ‘You complete me?’ Ugh. Notice I did not mention which movie. I don’t have to. I have heard this sentiment expressed many times, in conversations, in songs, in the interrogations of single people as though their lives depended on getting married. This concept […]
Valuable Connections
When I was single, I attended a small community church and they welcomed me as one of their own. It felt like I had been part of the family for years, maybe even decades. They were like a spiritual family to me. So readily did they embrace me that one particular family included me in […]
A Countercultural Conversation with Craig Wynne
Twelve years ago I was a frustrated singleton. I went shopping for books on the subject, but I found, to my dismay, there was not much out there. This was the inspiration behind my book, Surviving Singledom. Since then, to my relief, more and more books have come out about surviving, embracing and celebrating the […]
A Stranger on Earth
Living on earth can take a toll on us. Pandemics. Natural disasters. Poverty. The exhaustion of politics, corruption and social causes. This life can be painful. And some days it can feel like the pain will never end. As a person living with chronic illness, the pain is literally never-ending. Don’t get me wrong. Some […]
Single vs Pre-Married
I walked into church and was greeted by an usher. ‘Hiya Steph,’ he said cheerfully, ‘How’s your love life?’ Oh no. You did not just ask me that. My sarcastic inner voice nearly replied out loud. ‘It’s great. Who are you, by the way?’ This man barely knew me. We were not close, yet he […]
Creative Compost
I wrote a blog earlier today. And it stank. It stank like a bucket of prawns in the sun. It stank like a drain. It stank so much it took my mind off the stinky cat litter in the next room. It stank like a compost heap. Why am I writing about a stinky blog? […]