Badge of Honour

The place is a disaster zone. Furniture overturned. Rubbish piled high. Chaos and disorganisation as far as the eye can see. Yep, I just moved house. It is easy to see a new house as being some kind of badge of honour. Society tells us that material things are markers of success. Got the house? […]

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Childless-By-Forced-Choice

I was married for two years when I was diagnosed with lupus. I was thirty-one at the time. The lupus diagnosis came after eight years of mysterious symptoms and misdiagnoses. (In that respect, the diagnosis was a blessing.) It was not a shock. It finally gave me clarity on all the bizarre, seemingly coincidental medical […]

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Pass It On

I had a challenging time with childlessness at work this week. Normally I am fine with childlessness at work; I talk to parents all the time, no biggie. This week, we had a training day on learning to run a new group for parents. No problemo. I did not even think twice about it. On […]

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Did You Survive?

I think I survived Christmas. I mean, my heart is still beating, I am still breathing, so I guess I survived. All of my limbs are still attached, so I guess I’m still in one piece. Prior to Christmas, there was an onslaught of Christmas survival blogs, especially for single and childless people. Advice abounded, […]

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For Those Who Have No Children

There’s Christmas in the air, it’s clear, It’s magical, this time of year, Anticipation looming near – Unless you have no children. There’s Christmas ads for games and toys, To buy for every girl and boy. Too bad you’ll never have that joy – Because you have no children. There’s Christmas lights all over town, […]

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The Outsiders – Part 2 (A Worship & Creatives Conference Review)

I recently blogged about the outsiders: a group of people who do not fit into mainstream society. As an ex-single person, I remember being an outsider. As a childless person, I am still an outsider. As a creative, I have always been an outsider. Christians are definitely outsiders too. Today we explore another facet of […]

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Why I Still Go To Church

I recently received a thought-provoking reply to my blog, “Real Love”, from a person who seemed to think that Christianity was a life choice best avoided. My blog, addressing some of the unhelpful comments made by Christians toward the childless, seemed to prompt a reaction from this reader. This person’s response was along the lines […]

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“When Are You Going To Have Kids?”

When I was single, no-one asked me about having kids. No-one was interested in my plans for a family. No-one cared about my eggs and whether or not I was putting them to good use. For the first twenty-nine years of my life, no-one thought I was wasting my time or misusing my body. Then […]

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Real Love

“You will never know real love,” intoned the preacher, “Never experience the full extent of God’s love, until you have your own child.” I was a teenager then: young, passive and impressionable. The preacher’s words certainly made an impression on me that day. Gee, non-parents must miss out big time. These days, I am not […]

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Forced Choice

I had been married for two years when I was diagnosed with lupus. I was thirty-one years old at the time. My husband and I had decided to enjoy our time together before making any hurried decisions about family. Our deadline was to make a decision by the time I turned thirty-five. We were not […]

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