In my time of participating in the dating world and hearing about friends’ dating experiences, I’ve gathered a collection of worthy traits to look for in a partner. I’ve also gained some hard-won wisdom about red flags (haven’t we all?) when deciding whether to continue in a relationship—or whether to run! When considering dating, it’s […]
Christian
Myths of Singledom
I met my husband later in life: I was twenty-nine. OK, that may not sound like a ‘late’ marriage, but in my church circles everyone was married by the ripe old age of twenty-one. At twenty-nine, I was considered practically retired. Or a leper. During those years of singledom, I encountered some interesting myths and […]
Survival Skills: It’s Not Fair!
There are times when I get super jealous of able-bodied people. There, I said it. As much as envy is not exactly a fruit of the Spirit, this try-hard Christian experiences jealousy on a semi-regular basis. I feel it watching other people climb stairs without a problem. I experience it when friends regale me with […]
Prayer of a Disfigured Christian
“The servant grew up before God—a scrawny seedling, a scrubby plant in a parched field. There was nothing attractive about him, nothing to cause us to take a second look. He was looked down on and passed over, a man who suffered, who knew pain firsthand. One look at him and people turned away. We […]
Survival Skills: The God Who Allows Pain
‘Why does God allow suffering?’ is a common catch-cry in our society. Christians and non-Christians alike struggle with the concept of a God who either doesn’t seem to care about our pain, or who cares but appears powerless to intervene. For a Christian who believes God is all-powerful as well as all-caring, it’s a conundrum. […]
Not Your Typical Self-Help Book (Thank God)
I can’t stand self-help books. You know the ones that advertise ‘Seven Steps to a Completely Successful Life’ and ‘Nine Ways to Be the Best Christian Ever’? Yep, not a fan. It’s not that I think these topics are trite or unworthy of our time. Quite the opposite. These are hugely important discussions for us […]
Is Singledom A ‘Season’?
‘Don’t worry, your singleness is just for a season,’ my friend reassured me. ‘Why don’t you use this season to work on yourself?’ Ugh. There is so much in these two seemingly innocuous sentences that irks me. Beyond the misconception that once you work on yourself the right partner will magically appear, summoned by your […]
Music is My IV
I’ve been listening to music during my latest illness flare. A lot. You could say music is my IV. Music has always been a lifeline for me. From childhood days when I would sing songs softly to God at bedtime, through teenaged years of alternate rock and angst-ridden folklore, to now when I sing for […]
Single AND Content? In This Economy?
It’s funny how contentment can shift as time passes. For years, I was content being single. People around me were getting married, having babies, trialling separation. I felt genuinely happy for them (or sympathetic, in the case of separation), without even a glimmer of jealousy or discontentment. Occasionally I felt lonely, living solo in my […]
Multiplication Challenges—Or Are They?
‘How do you deal with being childless at church?’ a friend recently asked me. ‘Do people put pressure on you to “Be fruitful and multiply”?’ I nodded emphatically. ‘You betcha. Happens all the time.’ Her eyes widened. ‘How do you deal with that?’ It’s a good question, isn’t it? What is the best way to […]