I relate to the boy with the loaves and fish. In John 6, Jesus fed a crowd of five thousand people by taking an anonymous boy’s food, five loaves of bread and two fish, and handing it out. Not only was everyone satisfied, they had twelve baskets full of leftovers. I feel like that as […]
childless
Surviving Childlessness—Furbabies
Cats have an uncanny knack for making their presence known. My furbaby, an eighteen-year-old rescue cat, likes to jump on the bed—while I’m sleeping, naturally—and give me snuffly kisses until I pat her. Wherever I am, she’ll find a way to climb on top of me and fall asleep for three hours. My furbaby also […]
Surviving Childlessness—Faith
Following God into ministry or into the mission field requires incredible faith. So does following God into a job in construction or a management position or a university course. And following God into childlessness requires faith too. Every Christian’s journey calls for extraordinary trust in God. Our faith overflows to our circumstances, our relationships, every […]
That’s Risky
There is risk inherent in sharing your story. Speaking up about childlessness is risky. What will people think of you? What will they say? Will they exclude you, mock you, reject you? The risk is real. And that’s not the only risk childless people face. There are risks involved in trying to get pregnant—and in […]
3 Reasons I Love Book Launches
What’s not to love about a book launch? Meeting people, getting to talk for a long time, people hanging on your every word. Book launches are a great ego trip. And you might sell copies of your book too! In fact, I love book launches so much that this time around I’m holding two of […]
My Baby Book
Tomorrow is the launch of my new book, Surviving Childlessness. And it feels like I’m birthing a baby. (It’s possible to give birth, even when you are childless.) This is not the only time I have felt like I have birthed something other than a biological child. When my first book was published, I felt the same way. […]
You’re ‘Lucky’
I have been told I’m lucky for not having kids. Usually this is in the context of well-meaning friends sharing their heartache over their kids going off the rails. They lament to me about their heartache and then say something along the lines of ‘You’re lucky you don’t have to deal with that’ or ‘You’re […]
Leaving Legacies—Writing
‘Write with great care,’ exhorted my university professor, ‘because everything you write lasts for eternity. Once your words are written down somewhere, they are immortal.’ I was twenty-one years old when I heard those words, spoken by my psychology tutor. He was, of course, referring to the clinical notes and reports written by professional psychologists. […]
Childless-By-Forced-Choice
Childless-not-by-choice. Childless-by-circumstance. Childfree. There are many terms used to describe those who do not have children. It can be hard to know where one fits in the no-kids community, let alone society in general. A childless friend once told me I am childless-by-circumstance because of my medical condition. They said it was a unique circumstance […]
Finding Meaning in Childlessness
‘I was put on this earth to be a mother,’ my childless friend lamented. ‘What will I do with my life?’ Such is the lament of many childless women. Men also grieve the lost chance of fatherhood. When you truly believe your purpose in life is to raise children and, if you are Christian, teach […]