When I first bought my rescue cat, Portia, I thought I was doing a good thing. I saved her from death row, and I loved the idea of giving her a forever home. All the warm fuzzies. I had no idea she would save me. Portia was my companion in singledom. Portia was my companion […]
Farewell, My Furbaby
She sniffed at the edges of the carrier box, uncertain about stepping into the middle of the room with a stranger. She looked around and glanced at me, sitting cross-legged on the floor. I held my breath. Would she like me? Would I like her? Would this end horribly? Then, like a windfall, she stepped […]
Single, Lonely…and Content?
Have you ever been told you should be content with being single? Has anyone promised you that as soon as you find contentment, your spouse will magically appear? These might sound like rhetorical questions, but I genuinely want to know. Because when I was single and lonely and frustrated about it, I was flooded with […]
Radical Rest
We all dream of holidays. This photo was taken from a wonderful holiday of mine. We all fantasise about exotic escapes, island getaways, country retreats or just a quiet break at home. For those of us who holiday once a year, there is a distinct feeling of weary anticipation as the year nears its end. […]
Non-Mother’s Day
To all who dreamed of being a mother, raising a child, passing on your most prized possessions and values, I see you. To all who fantasised about shopping for tiny clothes, fitting out a nursery and singing lullabies, I see you. To all who chose names and schools and godparents, I see you. To all […]
In Honour of Bereaved Mothers
This Sunday is International Bereaved Mother’s Day (first Sunday in May every year). In honour of bereaved mothers everywhere, I want to acknowledge the different kinds of bereaved mothers in our communities. The mothers who had a child or children and lost them. The mothers of stillborn babies. The mothers who lost pregnancies to miscarriage. […]
For Singles: Milestones Worth Celebrating
Single people frequently feel left out of major life milestones and celebrations. Married people get to have weddings, bridal showers, kitchen teas, Valentine’s Days and anniversaries. If they have children, they get baby showers, Mother’s and Father’s Days, and all their children’s milestones too: first steps, first words, starting school, first dates, graduation, first jobs, […]
Not Yet Resurrected
I have been sick for two weeks. At the start, I thought it was just a cold. Boy was I wrong. I have been struggling to breathe ever since. Every little thing causes my breathing to get worse, so I have been virtually living in lockdown. And I am no better. I finally made it […]
False Hope or False Economy?
When I was single, I was the unwitting recipient of false hope. ‘It will happen for you.’‘You’ll meet someone.’‘You’re gonna make some man very happy one day!’ And of course, the trump card from Christian friends: ‘God will not deny you the desire of your heart.’ The same thing happens to childless people as well. […]
A ‘Real’ Woman
I recently read Chocolat and, without giving spoilers away, there’s a bit when one of the characters falls pregnant. What follows is a rather euphoric description of this woman feeling ‘full’ and ‘satisfied’. As though being pregnant, and having children, makes a woman complete. I am not in any way deriding this novel, which was […]