It’s hard not having sex when you’re single. Even when you’re a Christian. And even when you’re female. I’ve heard Christians still have sex before marriage, they just wait longer than the non-Christian mainstream. And Christians utilise porn, both men and women. So Christians are thinking about sex, and having sex, despite the church’s teachings […]
Author: Steph Penny
Finding Meaning in Childlessness
‘I was put on this earth to be a mother,’ my childless friend lamented. ‘What will I do with my life?’ Such is the lament of many childless women. Men also grieve the lost chance of fatherhood. When you truly believe your purpose in life is to raise children and, if you are Christian, teach […]
Childless People Have ‘Real Families’ Too
I constantly read online rhetoric about ‘working families’. All too often, this means two adults with children. It is the mainstream, the norm, the personification of the popular-yet-mythical ‘nuclear family’. Of course, not all forms of family fall under this definition. Traditional assumptions view families as adults-plus-children, which excludes childless people and treats them as […]
Five Things I Learned From A Church Scandal
The worst time I ever had in worship ministry was when our worship team went through a big scandal. Church scandals are tough at the best of times. But when it happens in your own team to people you love, by people you love, it is downright heartbreaking. And destructive. I’ll spare you the sordid […]
The Hope Series – Part 3: Breathing
I was thirty when I had a heart attack. OK, it wasn’t really a heart attack. But it sure felt like one. When the pain in my chest first started, I thought it was no big deal. I took some pills for what I thought was muscle pain. But as I sat there, arms wrapped […]
The Hope Series – Part 2: Singing
I have twice lost my voice to illness. Not just colds and flus either. I’m talking prolonged periods of hoarse talking, effortful breathing and painfully reduced singing ability. And those voice problems have not responded to the usual treatments. That’s because my vocal problems have not been caused by the usual culprits: bad singing technique, […]
The Hope Series – Part 1: Music
I absolutely love the piano. I love the grandeur and subtlety of the sound, the evocative and rhythmic range and the feel of the smooth keys. I love the roar of the lower octaves and the tinkling sweetness of the higher ones. The piano can make me dance and cry and sing all at once. […]
Why I Don’t Mind Turning 40
Some people are terribly afraid of ageing. In my early twenties I travelled with a group of girls who were petrified of the big two-five. ‘I really struggled with turning twenty,’ one of them confided. ‘I don’t know how I’ll cope with being twenty-five.’ I was in my thirties at the time. It baffled me […]
The Power of Rest
Rest is countercultural. It challenges popular notions of busyness and productivity, of working and earning, of our value lying in usefulness. ‘Achievers’ often receive praise and accolades, and busyness is socially reinforced. ‘How are you?’ ‘Oh, you know, busy.’ ‘I got a lot done today.’ ‘Let me check my diary and get back to you.’ […]
Identity Crisis
Have you seen that movie where the guy says to the girl, ‘You complete me?’ Ugh. Notice I did not mention which movie. I don’t have to. I have heard this sentiment expressed many times, in conversations, in songs, in the interrogations of single people as though their lives depended on getting married. This concept […]