Big Ugly Spider

When I was a kid, I lived in a house with a big ugly spider outside the front door. We had a front verandah with a few concrete steps leading up to it. In front of these concrete steps was a lovely tree. Big Ugly Spider set up permanent residence in a web stretching high […]

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New Fear’s Resolutions

Diets. Exercise. Stressing less. Every year people resolve to eat better, get fit and look after themselves. They set goals – realistic or otherwise – that reveal their hopes for the year that lies ahead. But for some of us, the coming of the new year is not heralded by fireworks and champagne. It is […]

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3 Things I Love and 3 Things I Hate About Christmas

There are some who would call me the Grinch. To a certain degree, this is true. The commercialism, the happy facades, the endless pressure to be and feel a certain way can lead to a distinct feeling of drudgery of the soul. But before I clothe myself in black and shuffle down the road muttering […]

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Moments of Kindness

My friend and I were sitting in a café, enjoying our hot beverages and chatting eagerly. I was saying how remarkable it was that even though my life was filled with pain and illness, I was still able to write books and do music stuff. “It is so strange,” I commented. “Even in the middle […]

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When Illness Kills Your Carpe Diem

Chronic illness sucks. Some days are not too bad, and it just sits quietly in the wings, biding its time. Then there are days like I had last week, when it kicks your legs out from under you. I was sitting at an appointment. It was a long sit. Three hours, to be exact. The […]

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Why Perfectionism and Chronic Illness Don’t Mix

I am a born perfectionist. I grew up with the work-hard, follow-the-rules, be-a-good-Christian-girl mentality. I walk into a room and spot the dirt. I hear when a singer is singing flat. I notice spelling mistakes in books. I am not looking for these things, but they are the first things I see. Perfectionism is based […]

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The Waiting Room

I spent this morning in a waiting room. Not coz I had nothing better to do. And not coz there was anything wrong with me. Thank you kindly for asking. It was for my cat. Yes, the things you do for love. While I was waiting for my cat to be seen, I got thinking […]

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Put It On My Tab

I heard a story yesterday about resilience. Apparently there was a man born without hands or legs. We are talking lifelong disability here. One day he was out in the snow, and when he came in, he said, “Brrr it’s cold! I’m so cold I can’t feel my hands.” But seriously folks. . . As […]

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Imprisoned

There are times in my wonderful, creative, blessed life when I feel imprisoned. I know I am a free white person and I understand the social and political privileges that come with that. But. I am living with chronic illness. And there are days when I feel caged in on all sides. Chronic illness is […]

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Lupus Is Easy

I’m pretty annoyed as I write this. Actually, I’m livid. It is not every day someone makes a comment that gets me this riled up. Except for a doctor who minimises my experience of chronic illness. I have been avoiding finding a new GP. But last week it was necessary. My chronic illness flared up […]

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