‘God said this once and for all; how many times have I heard it repeated? “Strength comes straight from God.”’ – Psalms 62:11 (MSG) The life of chronic illness is one of perpetual fatigue and weariness. I constantly feel physically weak, as though weights are attached to every part of my body. Everything from throbbing […]
relief
It Takes A Village…To Survive Childlessness
Submissions for the annual World Childless Week (WCW)* opened this week. I’m already thinking about what I might submit by way of written pieces. Inevitably, this has got me reflecting on why we bother to write at all, especially for something as public as WCW. I write partly for selfish reasons. Writing about my childless […]
Weird Childless Relief
After my recent surgery I experienced intense nausea and vomiting for a week. As the vomiting finally backed off, I remarked to a friend, ‘If morning sickness is anything like that, I’m glad I was never pregnant!’ I was slightly surprised at my own comment. Childlessness brings many unpleasant emotions with it: disappointment, anger, grief. […]
Flares, Flowers and a Big Pile of Manure
I had a flare-up this week. Before you ask, everything is OK, but at one point it was so bad it landed me in hospital. Flares can be scary. Chronic illness is painful enough, but when your symptoms flare from smouldering into flame, or when terrifying symptoms strike out of nowhere, it can bring your […]
Why Diagnosis Was a Relief For Me—and When Getting Better is Hard
Being diagnosed with a lifelong condition is a source of grief for many people. But diagnosis was actually a relief for me—and my grief sometimes gets worse when I get better, not just when I get sicker. I am unfortunate enough to be living with an absolute monster of an autoimmune disease commonly known as […]