I have an inner critic. It hisses in my ear when I’m doing well, mocks my efforts and tells me I may as well give up now and become a hermit who lives in the woods, collecting berries and communing with squirrels. It gives me an even worse time when I’m doing poorly, playing the […]
God
Of Beauty and Rage
No one tells you about the rage. I wish someone had. I wish when I was first diagnosed with lupus that someone wise, a doctor, a counsellor, a pastor, had sat me down and said, ‘Now, Steph, lupus is going to change you as a person. You will come to resent your own skin and […]
If You’re Lost…
I can’t believe it’s March already. 2026 is galloping ahead. For some of us, we already feel a bit behind the eight-ball. This has not been the year some of us were hoping for. In fact, for some of us, 2026 stinks. It’s going in a completely unwanted, violent, catastrophic direction. And we feel left […]
Why Living with Lupus is Like a Scavenger Hunt—Part 3
What about Faith? Faith can be a two-edged sword with chronic illness. On the one hand, God’s nearness and companionship have been a great comfort to me. On the other, God has not healed me of lupus. I have wrestled with this. After all, it would be a whole lot easier if God would simply […]
Why Living with Lupus is Like a Scavenger Hunt—Part 2
Finding my Tribe It’s not easy to find support for a rare disease like lupus. But I have a few close friends with autoimmune conditions, and there is nothing quite like the breath of fresh air that is a friend who gets it. When they describe the sensation of brain fog and I say, ‘Oh, […]
In Our Hands
He came as a baby, Hungry, needy, Dependent in every way. He learned Under the guiding hands Of his parents, Growing into a boy, Then a man. The God who created the Universe, Who carved the sphere of the Earth With his own two good hands, Who shaped animals and trees, Who sprinkles snow on […]
The Counterculturalism of Stillness
‘Be still and know that I am God.’ Psalm 46:10, NIV Nearly three years ago, I started practising stillness on a regular basis. Inspired by Julia Baird’s luminescent book, Phosphorescence*, and the constant noise inside my own head, I set myself a goal of becoming still at least once a day. It didn’t matter if […]
My Weird Testimony
‘I’ll pray for your healing,’ smiled the young woman. ‘Actually,’ I smiled back, ‘I think God has told me he’s not going to heal me.’ The woman frowned. ‘That’s not the God I know. My God would never deny me healing.’ ‘OK, let me tell you my weird testimony…’ In the not-too-distant past, I was […]
A Recovering Perfectionist Finds Joy
It’s been a difficult morning. A difficult month, actually. Nothing special, just the general busyness of work and life. Lots of appointments and medical things going on, all important, all worthwhile, but taxing. And it’s catching up with me. At times like these, I often hear the voice of the Perfectionist bellowing in my ear: […]
Beyond Yoga
Last weekend I participated in a first-time Indie Author Book Festival in Adelaide. I had so much fun talking to customers and chatting to fellow authors all day—the conversations were nearly non-stop! Lots of people stopped by my table to talk about chronic illness. One thing that came up again and again was how often […]