Last weekend I participated in a first-time Indie Author Book Festival in Adelaide. I had so much fun talking to customers and chatting to fellow authors all day—the conversations were nearly non-stop!
Lots of people stopped by my table to talk about chronic illness. One thing that came up again and again was how often people have been told to try yoga. Seriously, it got eerie! When yet another person told me they’d been recommended yoga (they were in a wheelchair, by the way), I said that people had been telling me that all day!
Now don’t get me wrong. Some people have found yoga to be quite helpful. One customer told me they had tried yoga and found it beneficial. But they also had liver disease, and unfortunately no amount of yoga was going to cure that.
I can relate to that. I’ve never tried yoga, but I do stretches every day and I always feel better for it. But no amount of stretching is going to cure the lupus inside my body. So even though yoga can be a good suggestion, it’s a frustrating one as well, because it’s not a long-term solution.
This begs an important question: what, if anything, is more helpful than yoga? Self-evidently, it depends on your situation and sometimes on what is happening on any given day. Sometimes nothing helps, even when you’re doing everything right. You can take all the pills, see all the doctors, eat all the organic foods and avoid all the stress, and still illness can upend your day—or your year.
Having said that, there are a few things I swear by:
– Joy. With the very real possibility of being sick for the rest of my life hanging over my head, I’ve decided to focus on quality of life as much as possible. I do things that make my heart sing: eat chocolate, read escapist tales, write fantasy and sci-fi stories, cuddle my cat, go travelling, spend time with people I love, play video games, connect with nature, compose songs and actually sing. Prioritising joy can be hard—all my life, I’ve believed work comes before play, therefore I have to earn the right to enjoy myself—but I’m learning that maybe it’s the most important thing after all.
– Support. As a lifelong rescuer, I’m tuned into the needs and emotions of others. This roughly translates to me being pretty bad at asking for help. But I’m getting better at putting my hand up earlier rather than later, and asking family, friends, loved ones, doctors, counsellors and helplines for help when I have a flare. It’s still not easy—but it’s necessary.
– Grace. The inescapable reality of chronic illness is that it can wear you down and a really bad day can knock you sideways. Some of my worst flares have kicked my legs out from under me, literally and also sanity-speaking and faith-wise. On those days, when I’m falling into the abyss, my resilience pared to the bone, my hope as brittle as my split nails—on those days, all I’ve got is God’s grace. I have nothing else to give. So I lean on God’s grace like a pillow and let it enfold me and hold me. There are fields and fields of grace waiting for us—especially when we need it most.
Yoga can be super helpful, and if you find it makes a difference to your wellbeing, knock yourself out. I hope you also find ways of pursuing joy in your life, leaning on your supports every now and again, and falling into the grace that waits in the bottom of the abyss of chronic illness.
What things do you find helpful in surviving chronic illness? What strategies would you recommend to a friend? How easy has it been for you to find joy, reach out for support, and collapse into God’s grace? Share your story. Let’s have a countercultural conversation.